I don't feel

I don't feel like being awake
I don't feel like sleeping
I don't feel like drinking
I don't feel like eating
I don't feel like watching tv
I don't feel like listening to music
I don't feel like sitting here in silence
I don't feel like being around other people
I don't feel like talking to anyone
I don't feel like being alone
I don't feel like crying anymore
I don't feel like wiping my nose anymore
I don't feel like shaking with fear anymore
I don't feel like shaking with grief anymore
I don't feel like writing anymore of this
I don't feel like anything
I

don't

feel

---

My dad got diagnosed with MRSA. He's supposed to go to the hospital to get treatment.

He told me he didn't think he was going to because he couldn't afford to miss work.

MRSA can be deadly if not treated/if not treated early enough.

I want to drive down there and slap the shit out of him, then drag him to the hospital for treatment.

I have class, I can't miss it, it's too late to drop classes without taking a 0 for the course.

MRSA is highly contagious, especially to people who have suppressed immune systems.

Such as Multiple Sclerosis, HIV/AIDS, Meningitis, the list goes on...

I've lost so many people in my life, right now I'm feeling like I'm losing my father. I was planning on going down to visit him when I get Spring Break, but I can't take the chance of contracting this too.

God forbid I ever get married, who the fuck is going to walk me down the isle?

My dad is so far away, there's no way I'd know if anything happened to him. I know no one down there and no one down there knows me or would even have the slightest idea how to contact me. I'm pretty sure my father didn't use his 25 year old daughter as his emergency contact.

I'm sorry, I'm stressing.